October 4th 2013; 8:53pm
I sat in my window seat, with a bowl of Ben & Jerry's chocolate chip cookie dough ice-cream nestled on my favorite lilac colored fluffy pillow that Alex had given me almost three years ago before anything had gotten serious between us. My room was quiet, apart from the stereo that currently had Beyoncé's fourth studio album on replay.
Why was my life so complicated?
In less than one week, I had managed to piss off the two guys that I may or may not be infatuated with, and now they wanted nothing to do with me. Avian especially, who completely loathed me.
Sighing, I placed another spoonful of ice-cream in my mouth and glanced out the window at the moon. Tonight, the moon's lunar phase was something called a 'new moon', the hell if I knew what that meant. The moon was growing smaller and currently seemed to echo my mood.
"I don't need this bullshit" his voice still replayed in my head. I groaned and dragged my attention back into the room, to Lolita who was currently sitting across from me, eating out of her bowl of ice-cream.
"You know, maybe it's not as bad as it seems"
I looked up from my ice-cream to stare pointedly at Lolita, who was now licking the bit of creamy goo that had rolled down the side of her lips.
How could she even say that?
My life was a freaking disaster.
Lolita rolled her eyes at the glare I was currently giving her and shrugged carelessly before placing her spoon back into the bowl to scoop up some more ice-cream.
"Honestly, I think you're exaggerating" she crossed her legs and glanced up at me, before slowly placing her spoon in her mouth.
Lolita had always, well, most of the time, been right but what did she mean by I was over exaggerating? Didn't she understand that they both loathed my presence? One had said he didn't need my bullshit and the other just basically told me to "forget it", then walked away.
What the hell did that mean?
"I'm just saying you have a lot to figure out! Maybe adding boyfriends to the list may be too ambitious right now"
I stared at her, and then glanced down into my bowl; my ice-cream was melting so I scooped up the slushy part and lifted the spoon to my lips.
"Besides, Alex had you first. You complicated everything when Avian showed up" Lolita shrugged, and glanced up at me.
"You say it like I did it on purpose," I said defensively, glancing back up at the moon in all its pride and glory "I can't help it okay?"
"You need to figure out what your deal with Alex is before you involve Avian in any way"
"But I have," I said, placing the bowl down in front of me and folding my hands against my chest "he doesn't want to accept that we broke up okay? There's a reason for that"
"Yeah, a reason that you don't even know" Lolita said, pointing her spoon at me. I groaned and raised my eyebrows at her.
"Whose side are you on?" I asked with a frown, turning my attention back to my ice-cream; it seemed to be the only thing that made sense at that moment. A cold, sweet dessert that made life seem a whole lot better. Well, until it melted and needed to be replaced with yet another spoon of the dessert.
"Look, all I'm saying is that maybe you should not be complicating your life with two romantic relationships right now," She inched closer and gave me a small smile "there is a lot that needs figuring out. Just forget Avian and Alex for now okay?"
"I tried," I whined, shrinking my lips into a pout. I sighed, then ran my hands through my hair "I can't just grab a knife and stab my emotions okay?"
"I know that," Lolita rolled her eyes, before picking up her bowl once again "Just take baby steps! First thing, accept what happened that night"
I glared at Lolita, before placing another spoon of ice-cream in my mouth. Sighing, she dropped the bowl and shook out her hair with her right hand.
"We have to talk it out eve
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